Overcoming Decision Paralysis: Should Women Take Shopping Cues From Men?

Are women’s lives programmed to be complicated? Do we let outside influences dictate decisions resulting in cluttered minds, homes and closets?

I won’t lie. I love being able to choose among many options at the store, whether it’s a cheery, colorful home accessory or a stylish, functional handbag. Simple things like these are a special delight. Unfortunately, the amount of time and emotional energy spent in DECIDING is not a delight.

Do we deprive ourselves of what really matters when we overthink our decisions? Would it be even better if we stopped pondering ten different options and just CHOSE something already? How do we simplify? Let’s see how the men do it.

Most men have fewer choices than women, thus they make less decisions in less time without the overwhelm.

Why is it easier for men to make shopping decisions than women?

1. They’re not bombarded with choices from birth to adulthood like we are. Their wardrobe choices are pretty simple. It’s just shirts, pants and shorts – rinse and repeat.

Let’s start with my son. A three-year old toddler and me deciding what clothes he should wear. The good news is, there aren’t many choices so deciding what he could wear is quick and easy. The bad news is, there aren’t many choices so unless I google “little boy style ideas” on Pinterest, I’m hard pressed to find clothes that reflect his particular uniqueness.

Now let’s contrast this with little three-year old girls. They have WAY more style options then boys. It seems like every dress, shirt, blouse, cardigan, skirt, and pant coordinate comes in every color of the rainbow. They also have accessories like hair clips, tutus and tiaras so they could channel their inner Princess Elsa from Frozen. Girls don’t have their “uniform” like boys do, although the default for little girls clothing tends to be pinks and purples.

Fast forward to adulthood. Dressing up for men doesn’t take long. They s**, shower, shave, and stare at their iPhones while waiting for US to get ready to go out. We stare at our closets and can’t decide what to wear, there are way too many choices. Should I wear the dress, oh but I wore it already and the same friends who saw it before will be there. What about those two other dresses? What about a pant and blouse combo or something sparkly with heels?  It goes on and on.

2. Men’s magazines have a simpler layout and don’t have as many ads as women’s magazines. No wonder us women are culturally programmed from a young age onward to HAVE too many choices. As someone who grew up on Sassy, Mademoiselle and copies of my mother’s Ladies Home Journal I’ve grown up on a diet of too many ads, and too many permutations of home and fashion design options. It’s no wonder we’re programed to have all this choice paralysis as adults!

Look at most men’s magazines with their simpler layouts and and fewer ads. Outside for instance shows stunning outdoor photographs of international parks and places I’d love to visit that’s on my life bucket list. In some ways I wish women’s magazines could have the same simplicity as Outdoor just because I already felt pretty zen just looking at it.

What do you think is more inspiring?

3. Guys simply DECIDE on the path of the least resistance. I was at the Coach Outlets after Christmas exchanging a gift and I distinctly remember one couple where the lady was browsing through about 20 different handbags, and her husband was rolling his eyes, and he said, “Why do you have to look at all those bags? Why don’t you just pick one and go?”

Then I was at J. Crew at the check out line, and I saw this attractive girl with an electric blue evening dress asking her boyfriend, waiting outside with his iPhone, not really paying attention, asking, “How does this look?” He looked up and said impatiently (but enthusiastically), “That looks AWESOME! Let’s get it and go.” Then as she walked back inside the dressing room, he rolled his eyes and continued looking at his cell phone. Now would you ever see a guy go into the store and ponder all these choices or just pick one thing and go? One thing we could take away from men is that they generally shop with a purpose in mind.

How does a woman simplify decision making in a world full options?
1. Know what you already have on hand so you know what to say “no” to. So, let’s say you need a new outfit for work or a special function. Are there things you love that you could use? Are there things you know you’ll need to borrow or purchase?

2. Do your homework and give yourself parameters. Research visual inspiration and choose your top 3-5 looks from Pinterest or fashion magazines or catalogs. Set timer for just 15-20 minutes and then STOP when you found outfits that look good enough.

3. Force yourself into limited options. If you need to shop, decide to round out just the 3-5 looks you decided on so you don’t get distracted by bright, shiny objects that have nothing to do with your immediate shopping goals. Before going to the store, have your list, budget and coupons handy.

4. Use Peer Pressure. If you have trouble making decisions, bring a decisive friend with you, someone who’s going to give a hard “yes” or “no.” For me I either bring my husband or text him options and he’ll tell me right away – it makes deciding a helluva lot easier!

With these tips, women will better be able to keep decision paralysis at bay.